Here we go. Some more of The Taverners Take Barbados.
When last we saw our adventurers, they were about to brave the descent to Certain Death Beach (aka Bottom Bay Beach). At street level, there’s room for three or four cars and the requisite dude selling cocktails in coconuts. So you don’t really have any idea what to expect from the beach. How good could it be? Back where we come from, any beach worth the name has three conveniently located six-level concrete garages, a 7-11, and a Holiday Inn.
We descended the intriguingly well-kept but low-key trail with no expectations. So when we stepped out of the jungle and onto the stunning kilometer-wide white sandy beach with all of four other people on it… well, we were all smiles.
Marjorie found a patch of shade under the massive coral cliff and I soon discovered the large cave. While the ladies made themselves comfortable I followed the cave in as deep as I could, finding all manner of amazing fossilized coral. Also deck chair frames and a few empty rum bottles. Naturally.
Back at the blanket, I did my best to capture the vista with the iPhone’s panorama feature. Turns out the AI has a really hard time with surf. But I eventually got something good enough to share. The image is about 160 degrees wide, so go ahead and cut the image out from your monitor and wrap it around your head. There. That’s how amazing this beach is.
We couldn’t wait to get Avery into the water. She loves the bath. She loved the pool. Surely this was going to be The New Best Thing Ever.
Nope. Did not like. In retrospect, who in their right mind would enjoy seeing an entire horizon of water rushing right toward you, clearly hell bent on swallowing you whole? So. Not a fan.
But she enjoyed the blanket and some snacks just fine. And drinking water from our bottle was a highlight, for sure.
Bottom Bay Beach: amazing pristine beach, isolated but not hard to reach. Do not go in the water. It will eat you.
Coming up next: the road trip across the island to… a really fancy resort whose name escapes me.
It’s taking forever to get all the pics cranked through Photoshop in the few minutes of me time I have each day. So let’s just get to it.
Day 1 – We had an early flight, which meant getting out of bed at 4:30 or so. That used to be a really big deal, and worth contemplating just staying up. In a post-Avery world, that’s not much earlier than she greets the day anyway. So, yeah, that’s early, and ungodly so, but that’s how the new Taverners roll. I guess. Hooray.
Anyway, early flight means early arrival. Hello, Barbados! We landed in time to tag the usual bases, picking up the rental car, navigating to the villa to meet the property manager lady (Jan, very nice), and backtracking to the local supermarket to get a few necessities. Of course there was time for a dip in the pool. There is always time for a dip in the pool. Lava could be bearing down on us, and there would still be time for a dip in the pool. But I digress. Our villa was on the east side of the island, in Bottom Bay in the parish of St Philip.
Then we drove by tourist map (hilariously not entirely accurate) to the south side – Oistins in the parish of Christ Church. Friday nights there is a massive fish fry next to the fish market right on the beach, and that’s The Thing You Do On Friday Night. So we did. We hit it up early, partly because of Avery, but also because we knew it would be a loud and boisterous zoo. We went to Pat’s, because the reviews said we should. And they were right. While my fried chicken was authentic but mediocre, Marjorie’s Mahi Mahi was excellent. Recommend. We wrapped up just as the dj was cycling up the theatre-sized sound system.
Full of good food, and having enjoyed our first Banks (the beer of Barbados), we navigated home and crashed out at something like 9:30. Because that’s how we roll. I had a dip in the pool before bed, naturally. Glorious.
In the morning, we assembled the provisions and gear, and sallied forth on our next quest: to check out the beach at Bottom Bay, where swimming is stupid but the beach itself is supposed to be stunning. Stay tuned for that next episode.
Avery turned 7 months old (seven months!), which we figure makes her old enough for the zoo, if not old enough for a safari, where she would frequently be mistaken for lunch. No, the Bronx Zoo is about the right speed for us at the moment, sans gangland cache.
We started with birds. Lots of birds. Have you noticed how many birds there are in zoos? Lots. I think it might be because of how relatively easy they are to display. In a nice big cage they can stretch their wings a bit, but you can still get close enough to get a good look. They’ll let you, because a lumbering flightless giant like you is pretty far down the list of stuff to worry about today.
Lots of birds. Avery wasn’t terribly interested, though at some point a classmate will probably come across the word aviary and try to say she’s full of birds or something. This is a thing parents think about when they name kids. This parent, anyway. Currently, however, birds are not a big priority in her world. Even that bald eagle who looks like he’s laughing his head off.
paparazzi strikes!
sea lion cruises
junior snoozes
you should brush more often
much more interesting than birds
So we looked for more interesting fare. The sea lions were happy to oblige us, happy being a relative term. When we found them they were enduring the shrieking of a kid demanding that they wake up. I wonder if that happens often? At any rate, they swam a few laps for us. And even though Avery was still dozy from yet another nap, she was intrigued enough by the giant swimming Thomases to want to hang out for a bit. That was fun. Then we got serious:
just a pair o’ rhinos
behind me what now?
curious adventure
monkey business is quiet today
what am I wearing?
teen giraffe hoodlums
Rhinos are frickin big. If one decided he wanted your seat on the bus, you would give it to him. Like, without even hesitating. No stealthy comparing of chest size or anything. Just, here you go, sir. And may I say your horn is looking especially pointy today. Avery didn’t notice. The flowers on the shrub next to her were way more interesting. The baboons stood a good chance of making the grade, but by then she was seriously hungry, and while I took pictures, they took a pitstop. She didn’t miss much – the wind was pretty cold at that point, and the baboons moseyed for cover.
Although, I just assumed it was the wind. They might have been intimidated out by those shifty looking teen giraffe hoodlums. Look at them. Just lurking. Looking all shifty. And hoodlumish. After the tank was topped up, we moved on. Did not need any of that.
And somehow we found ourselves back on the west coast. With totem poles and bears!
total pole (everybody’s on there)
kitty!
no. no, that’s a grizzly bear.
bears!
sad polar bear is very sad
Oh you didn’t believe me. Yeah, the bears. Now we had Avery’s attention. Well, the bears had her attention. Giant Thomas! Want to pet! It will love me as I love it! Yes, you could say the bears were definitely the highlight of the excursion for this little girl. And just around the corner was one of the low points for daddy. That polar bear was just about the sorriest sack of bear you ever saw. Look up mope in the dictionary, and there he is. All droopy and sad. He hauled himself up and dragged himself over to the door through which they must feed him, and he just paced around it endlessly. Such is his life, I think. Nice metaphor for the Incredible Melting World (hoorah!) of his wild northern brethren.
I needed a bit of an uptick, so we thought we’d check out the snow leopard and the lion.
fierce, but awfully cuddly-looking
everything he sees is food
one last bird
Sad snow leopard. Sad lion. The problem with zoos has always been their necessary evil. Animals belong in their native habitat, free to range and be wild. But if they’re out there, we don’t see them. And if we don’t see them, we shoulder into their world and build houses and streets and gas stations and utterly destroy any chance they have to survive. So zoos serve as the very best way to keep animals on our collective mind. Children get to see them, and they think about them with an entirely appropriate sense of wonder. Some of those kids grow up and take action to protect them. And the human encroachment is maybe not quite so murderous as it was a generation ago. So I remind myself to be positive, to share in Avery’s wonder. We got to see lions and bears and rhinos and a whole lot of birds. And with our help she will grow up knowing where her food comes from, the ecosystem we all depend on, and how she can do her part to protect and preserve the planet. So maybe one day we can travel (gently) into the wild and see some of these animals out there where they’re still happy. Thank you, zoo critters. For taking a really big one for the team.
Despite the heavy tone at the end there, we had a terrific last day with Gramma before she headed back to Vancouver. It was a much appreciated contrast to the news about the bombing at the Boston Marathon. As of this writing, the FBI has released an assembled video clip of their two suspects. Someone is going to ID these people, and maybe we will get some answers. That in itself is good news against the Senate’s abysmal failure to pass common sense gun law. These are trying times. You have to remind yourself that the times have always been trying. Remember the so-called Tylenol murders in 1982, or the October Crisis in 1970. There has always been a fringe element that violently resists the status quo. There probably always will be. It falls to each generation to renew its commitment to peace, to take us one step further from a culture of violence and toward a culture of understanding. Guns kill people. So far as I know, ears never have.
